


I Look Over You, Ram.

by cynical_ravenclaw



Series: Letters to the My Engineer boys. [2]
Category: My Engineer (TV)
Genre: Confession, Falling In Love, Happy Ending, Love letter to Ram, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:22:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24255811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cynical_ravenclaw/pseuds/cynical_ravenclaw
Summary: It's him, it has always been him. That boy with kindness in his eyes and sunshine in his smile....A letter to Ram. A sequel to the letter to King.
Relationships: King/Ram (My Engineer)
Series: Letters to the My Engineer boys. [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1750873
Comments: 16
Kudos: 60





	I Look Over You, Ram.

**Author's Note:**

> This letter is intended to be a sequel to my letter to King, _[King, This Is Your Love Letter.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24183730)_. While it isn't absolutely necessary to have read the first letter to enjoy this one, it might make certain elements a little bit clearer.  
> I hope you enjoy reading this!

You don't have to hide anymore, Ram. He knows how he feels.

Darling, there's no better way to put this. He loves you.

You know who I'm talking about. It's _him_ , it has always been him. That boy with kindness in his eyes and sunshine in his smile. You've known him for a month, but it feels like a saga of eons. 

You thought you tolerated him and his antics. You never realised when that tolerance sprouted into affection. Bloomed into unnamed feelings. Blossomed into love. Until one day when he wore your sunglasses and asked with teasing eyes if he was looking good in them. Suddenly, things had never been clearer. And you _knew._

You look at him and see the sun, bright and positive. Full of life. He looks at you and sees the moon, cool and calm. An eternal companion.

The song of your love, playing across the universe. His words are the verses, your silence adds the music. Hands on wrists are your cues. This grand opera plays across your lives, and you lose yourselves in it.

Eons of love, between you and him. Strengthened by your friendship. Tested time and again by circumstances. Proven by him, and proven by you, by quiet understanding and quieter gestures.

Side-by-side, you discovered each other. He noticed what makes you tick, you found out how his mind works. You are friends now. But you both secretly nurture hope for something more.

I look over you, Ram. This love, his and yours? I bear witness to it. I see it all, and I see you two better than you see yourselves.

I am writing you this letter in the moments just before he acts on it, reminding you that it’s not a mistake, nor a joke.

Do you remember when he offered to help you and your friends with homework? When the two of you sat side-by-side, and no one knew where you ended and he began? To this day, you don't remember what you were supposed to be solving. You remember him. You remember the way his proximity made your face heat up. You remember the exact moment your eyes met. You remember a desperate urge to do something. What, you didn't know. But _something._ You remember the disappointment in your heart when he looked away. You remember the giddy happiness you felt when he said he had summarised notes for you because he noticed you being confused. They were only notes, but they were his gift to you, for your eyes only. I witnessed it all. I was the moonglow that brightened the night.

He gave you a Venus Fly Trap. It was an apology for something that never offended you. He offered to walk you home. He teased. He took a lot of joy in teasing you, no doubt. You were no less either. He teased because your response made him giddy. You teased because he loved it when you did. You were playful because it provided an outlet for your yearning for each other. I know this because I have seen you yearn. I saw the way he searched your face. I felt the way your pulse quickened.

You took him out for dinner. He thinks you do that because you want to pay him back for his help, and you let him. It's not the real reason though. You like being around him. You enjoy his company. But he doesn't need to know that, does he? Love, if he knew, he would smile at you brighter than the midday sun.

He shared his secret with you. The one corner of the world that is more precious for him than anything else, and he shared it with you. When you were admiring the place, he took the time to admire you. The way he looks at you, Ram, is the same as the way you look at him. With tender appreciation. With sheer disbelief in your luck. Like you cannot comprehend why he would ever want to be your friend. He feels the same about you.  
He placed a flower behind your ear. That gave you the confidence to be open, to be honest. He shared his secret and you shared yours. Told him that he was the person who understood you. I was his nervousness and your open honesty.  
He doesn't know you kept that flower. He doesn't know you've kept it safe, tucked away in the pages of college notes. The ones he gave you. If he knew, he would be elated beyond any comparison.

He found you, standing in the middle of nowhere. Apprehension and worry clouding your eyes. He loves you more than he fears your dogs. So he took you home. I was the cool breeze of the night which followed you.  
You wanted him to ask what was wrong. He didn't, he had already guessed. You hadn't realised he'd learnt to read you so well.  
He put a hand on your head and smiled warmly at you. All acceptance and no judgement. Your armour shattered in that moment. Because if there was anyone in the world who you could trust, it was him. It had always been him.  
I was there when he stood by you, both literally and figuratively. When you told him why you left home. You don't know this, but he decided, then and there, that he would move heaven and earth to ensure you never feel such pain again. He stood by you, said nothing. Held you close to him, hoping he could take away even a little of your grief so you wouldn't have to suffer as much. I was there, in the wetness of your eyes and the heaviness of his heart. The Earth could swallow you whole, but he'd hold you tight.

He had to get stitches and you held his hand throughout, his rock in tumultuous times. You made sure he ate, made sure he took his medicines on time. I was the comfortable domesticity between you two. When he traced your tattoo with the gentlest touch you have ever felt, I was the shiver that ran down your spine. When he put his hand over yours, you looked at him. Softer than you ever have. I was the hope that bloomed in his heart.

You live together now. Sleep in the same bed. At night, when you both sit on the couch watching a random documentary after dinner, you yearn. To put an arm across his shoulders and to pull him close. To drop a kiss to the top of his head. But you're scared. When you wake up in the morning, hair all ruffled and falling in front of still sleepy eyes, he yearns. To run his fingers through your hair. To press his lips to yours in a _"Good morning, love"_. Darling, he's scared too.

There are moments, like the one on the bus. There are moments when you say something that leaves him stunned. Sweetheart, he is never stunned because you said it, he is stunned because of what your words make him feel. There are moments, like the one on the bus, when you touch him and it sets his nerves on fire. The heat that hangs between your shared gazes then, that heat makes you fear that the world might burn down. Let the world burn, love, he's worth it. He is worth it all.

This love between you and him? This love isn't a whirlwind romance, no. Your love is an old evergreen. It sprouted from a small seed, and steadily became taller. It grew branches. It took its time to be what it is now. Your love is the shade when the sun shines too hot. Your love is here to stay, for years and years to come.

This is your time to be friends, each other's support systems. To be lovers, devoted for eternity. To dance under the starry sky, a perpetual waltz, your hand in his, his eyes on yours.

Nobody can tell you what you feel for him, and what he feels for you, nobody but me. Because I look over you two, and I see you better than you see yourselves. I am writing you this letter in the moments just before he acts on it, reminding you that it’s not a mistake, nor a joke.

You’re in love with him. And he is in love with you.

He is in love with you and he wants to tell you he is, but he's scared. So when that door opens and he walks in, give him the warmest smile you can. When he gathers the courage to bare his soul, hold him. Hold him and tell him you feel the same. That you always have. He already knows but hearing it from you means a lot more.

You don't have to hide anymore, Ram. He knows how he feels. He knows how you do. And he's ready to act on that knowledge.

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hello on [Tumblr!](https://fandomscoffeeandbooks.tumblr.com)


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